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How do you deal with people who like to argue?

By EmeraldJewel7
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66 comments

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7

It really depends on whether the other person actually knows HOW to argue properly.

KKGator Level 9 Dec 16, 2018

I would add that it is necessary for the other person to also be capable of thinking, which capability I have found to be exceedingly rare.

6

Divorce worked for me.

Byrdsfan Level 8 Dec 16, 2018

πŸ˜„

Worked for me too!!

5

Depends on who is doing the arguing and how important it is to me to defend my position on an issue. I choose my battles carefully. If someone is just arguing for the sake of being argumentative, I ignore them.

Deb57 Level 7 Dec 16, 2018
5

I use my leadership skills: I listen, identify the problem, and work on resolving the issue. No matter how little the problem. Or I'll try my best.

(Depending on the issue, and how it affects me directly, of course.) Otherwise, I might have to channel out my ninja skills. Know what I mean, Gene? Hehehe... kidding on the last part. Maybe?πŸ˜…πŸ˜‚πŸ˜…

Chronic arguers are not interested in solving a problem they are interested in expressing their own disturbed emotions

4

I keep asking why until they get tired of talking. lol

MrChange Level 7 Dec 16, 2018

Hahaha

The Five Why's of why I am single. Beautiful!

4

I leave them in the dust.

purcascade Level 5 Dec 16, 2018
4

No one can keep an argument going by themselves... I refuse to be on the other side of their volley net !

Also - it's good to be clear whether it's a pointless argument, or a civil, and potentially useful debate.

evergreen Level 8 Dec 16, 2018
4

I don't. I turn around and walk away.

Spinliesel Level 8 Dec 16, 2018
3

Well I'm someone who likes to argue, so if you don't want to argue with me I'd suggest just not responding. It would piss me off personally but eventually I would wander off to yell at someone on the internet or to grumble to myself while cleaning dishes.

3

I believe what I believe and I do not have to justify myself to anyone...

momothomas Level 1 Dec 16, 2018
3

Mostly I avoid them. With a personal relationship, family or friend I like to keep it as a conversation/ discussion but sometimes it can escalate to an argument, in that case, I just try to end it and if necessary walk away. If I feel responsible for the escalation, I will apologize. But there are some hot topics that I will just plain avoid.

BeeHappy Level 8 Dec 16, 2018
3

I avoid them

AliceDaneal Level 7 Dec 16, 2018
3

Wait outside and run over them with my truck.

Sticks48 Level 9 Dec 16, 2018

Yes!!!

3

It takes two(or more) to argue, so if you don't want to argue then don't argue.

jamrock876 Level 6 Dec 16, 2018

When living with others it does not always work that way. "He just won't stop. He follows me all over the house. He won't shut up,....."

This is not an easy issue.

Plus, one person’s argument is another’s discussion.

3

It depends on the topic and how well the other side's argument is constructed. I hate arguing with stupid people. But with someone reasonably intelligent, making a reasonable argument, I often enjoy them.

P.S. I think I am one of those. People who like to argue. But I want to argue well, not make declaratory statements and dumb personal attacks (but I do have to admit that I have done them too....)

KenChang Level 7 Dec 16, 2018

@KenChang Ditto!

3

I walk away. Through online dating, I met a man who loved to argue. He thought it was fun. I dumped his combative, contrary ass.

I want a kind, respectful man, not someone who enjoys upsetting me.

LiterateHiker Level 8 Dec 16, 2018
3

I listen to what they have to say, refute any misinformation they may have and find common ground with them on the parts that we do agree on. Lather, rinse, repeat until either they and I are on the same page, they exhaust themselves, or they walk away frustrated that they couldn't get the typical reaction that they expected, which is that they will browbeat someone into walking away so they can feel like they "won" the argument. It's really nice when you can turn an argument into a discussion and it makes dealing with them much more reasonable in the future because they know you won't just blow them off and disrespect their views by shutting down or trying to shut them down. In other words, sometimes they just need to be heard. What many take as argumentative is usually frustration from not being given the respect of being heard, as if their opinions are somehow less valid than everyone else's. Nothing like water to take the heat out of fire.

Kafirah Level 7 Dec 16, 2018
3

Lol I have a really good friend like this, and I usually just feed wood to the fire. He gets super into it and I just laugh, watch and enjoy our shit show πŸ˜‚

Kayterade5348 Level 5 Dec 16, 2018

This guy sounds like an absolute stud muffin

Edited

@Renickulous He definitely is

3

Walk away. There is nothing that they hate more. Shut off their oxygen, the longer you engage with them the more they like it...so don’t give them that satisfaction.

Marionville Level 9 Dec 16, 2018
2

I work with someone who would never say they like to argue, but will say they play the "devil's advocate." That's code for "I will always take the other side because I love to dominate and win the conversation." I avoid this person, and if I do have to talk with them, I start by saying, "Just a quick question," or "Just a quick comment." I refuse to be drawn into a debate, an argument, or a one-sided conversation that takes up way too much of my time and attention.

linxminx Level 7 Dec 18, 2018

We have a few of those here. I think you have a successful tactic in your arsenal!

2

I try to win as many arguments with them that I can. That sometimes discourages them.

Bluesboybob Level 2 Dec 18, 2018
2

First actually understand and identify what the argument is. Then establish the facts to see the truth and then use those to create points to argue for the reallity of the situation!

Jammo Level 5 Dec 16, 2018

It’s not really about Facts- it’s all about their undefined anxiety. There is a major difference between an argument and a discussion.

Chronic arguers really just want attention and a way to relieve some tension.

@Weismonger well if that's how the interlocutor thinks you're argument with them is very difficult to persuade. It's the lack of reasoning that creates a situation of lost reality!

@Jammo very true-And if people used more reason, logic & reality there would be less arguments to begin withβ€”But too much fantasy including religion is in my opinion the cause of so much cognitive dissonance, Irrational and unproductive narcissism and a lack of understanding of the subconscious memory system for making decisions this all results in arguments & Oppression β€”I firmly think that without religion and other such fantasies in the world like socialism and communism that are actually utopian religious belief systems it would be a much more progressive and better world... and this is why When confronted by the religious & another believers in irrational beliefs systems I constantly say β€œprove it!β€œ>> what proof do you have that what you say is either true, real or works? And that usually shuts them up.

2

Shut down and avoid. I get zero pleasure from arguing.

Zster Level 7 Dec 16, 2018
2

Argue about what? Is there any validity to their argument? Or are they like the paid contrarian in the old Monty Python sketch?

Bobbyzen Level 7 Dec 16, 2018
2

I won't indulge arguers. I used to be one and it is just exhausting trying to be right all the time. πŸ˜› I came across a saying that I try to live by "I would rather be happy than right?

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