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Do you ever miss the religious life?

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374 comments

20

I don't miss the life, but I sometimes miss the interactions. WHich is why I joined this group.

TMCBird Level 3 Sep 30, 2017
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I also miss the community . It is sometimes lonely when you stand up for what you believe. It is worse to be a hypocrite.

17

No way. There is absolutely nothing I miss about hanging out with the brainwashed dogmatic hypocrites that form most of the church. Church music sucks and I can get a good enough coffee and donuts at Starbucks! I definitely don't miss sitting through pointless sermons and wasting all that precious time praying for nothing. Honestly, I'm still pissed that in this finite life I had to waste so much of it on religion. I think I probably spend as much time now rallying against religion as I did participating in it due to the anger I feel at being indoctrinated and lied to in the most foundational years of my life. I don't want others to have deal with this rubbish if I can possibly help them avoid it in any way. I dream of a secular society.

Hugene2002 Level 7 Oct 28, 2017
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While I sympathise with your sense of frustration - at being so mislead - please don't beat yourself up with such anger. Acknowledge it and just let it go...... aaaahhhhh. Just being alive is too amazing an experience to waste it in regrets or recriminations. Remember the song - 'Don't worry. Be happy'. Great advice. Cheers.

To prevent feeling angry and frustrated all the time, I learned to see the humor in it all. If you have some time ask one to clarify something from the bible you found contradictory or just wrong. Don't hound them too hard or you will get the classic "it's in the Bible. God said it so it's true " .Pointing out that the bible is not god's personal assistant's notes ,straight from the horses mouth is counterproductive . If you can keep them talking they are a wellspring of ignorant comedy gold.

Irony for you? I grew up with very little adult supervision. Heathen, Bohemian from the start. Growing up in rural Alabama I heard the shit all my life .The bible thumpers feigned concern and sympathy. I saw right through them, they had no genuine concern for me. They considered themselves above me and didn't want me influencing their daughters and sons I suppose in a different way. I laughed my ass off at the parents and felt bad for the brainwashed kids. I wonder if they will ever have a clue how sad and pitiful I have always thought them to be.

I definitely wish I had all those hours back, too, however; when I was a child, my fertile imagination saved me from the indoctrination.

I share your take on religion, but you will eventually watch the anger dissipate. I still have remnants of it myself, and I got out more than two decades ago.

Believers will see your raw emotion, and just say that you're angry at god; their way of defusing any otherwise good arguments you may have presented.

I like Thailand, for that reason. Thai Buddhism accepts a Third Gender and is so tolerant that animals wander in and out of the glittering temples, where you are free to come and meditate. The school kids often meditate before classes, twice a day, and it makes things peaceful and calm. But nobody bothers you, preaches at you, or condemns you.

10

its not easy to be atheist in my counrty . sometimes i wish i was as stupid as religious ppl and that my life would be easier but then i look at my way of thinking and just smile bkz i know i will always choose being like this

Haneen Level 5 Nov 21, 2017
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Hang in there and hopefully find a way out. America is not perfect but we still have freedom of religion and from religion. I think of you sometimes. I hate that you are being held back from reaching your potential f peace of mind and all the opportunities available to women that are not there yet.

@CaseyGoodwin i'm glad you've found freedom from religion in america. i live in florida, i'm a senior- seems everyone where i live are "christians". it gets rather lonely and frustrating when ppl don't want to talk to me, will openly chastise me and comment "i'm a christian! don't talk like that" (i was joking about a patch i was wearing to remove a wart). in a hurricane evac last year i was refused shelter in a neighbors's sister's home cuz I said god damn- told me they were christians- i'd thought supposed christians were charitable, didn't they want the time i woulda been confined due to the storm to "save my soul"?

7

My love of music, I guess, probably originated in church when I was very young. I greatly enjoy music, but I have come to abhor most religious music.... particularly the "modern" Christian rock and can't help but think that a lot of the Christian rockstars are singing all the way to the bank because God has been so good to them.

RedRiverRogue Level 5 Oct 28, 2017
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How about on the other end of time and quality, for instance Johann Sebastian Bach? Much of his music has religious themes. I find some of it just wonderful.

It's funny because when I was a kid my religious Grandma and her friends used to say in the 1960's that rock music of any kind is devil music or the kids are possessed by satan.

When religion loses followers, they will change so they can be more modern lol.

@ZebZaman Sadly, in the Middle Ages the main employer was The Church, so artists and musicians who wanted to be paid often had to play the religious game. Some had royal or wealthy patrons, and wrote music to fulfill certain obligations. I'm grateful for whoever/whatever inspired these people to make such beautiful music and artwork.

7

I think this is one of the most provocative questions here.

I miss the simplicity of the religious reasoning ("God is all forgiving" etc. etc.) but realise that coming to terms with our own existence is a struggle and rightly so. I shall die happy knowing that I delved into every aspect of life (philosophy, religion, science etc.) in order to develop an informed and personal opinion. It's been hard, without a doubt, but it's a better result than BLIND faith.

zanyfish Level 6 Oct 17, 2017
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What a perfect response.

And then there's our extensive and suppressing social conditioning to attend to - much of which we re totally unaware of. Until we REALLY start asking questions of ourselves and the 'reasons' we do what we do.

I like the way you thinksmile001.gif

@HopiMoon when I was 9 my mom converted to my sister's church from Methodist to fundie. ...so I was there when she had a white baptismal gown on standing in a deep 4 foot tank of green slimy water next to preacher in black robe. ...he mumbles puts a hanky over moms nose and dunks her.....then she blows snot and water out her nose and everybody can see her bra and panties though the sheet. ...next Sunday she kept elbowing me to go up front for the same torture. ...never happened

6

I don't miss it in the slightest. I love being open minded.

freedom41 Level 7 Mar 25, 2018
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5

No, no, 1000 times no! Went to church Sunday morning, night n Wednesday night. My folks were hypocrites. When I was 38, I realized, I don't have to do this anymore! I fired my parents!!! Best decision ever!!

Wiktwikn Level 2 Mar 27, 2018
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5

I don't miss religion at all.

What i do miss is hte sense o community and sense of belonging, which in my opinion is the real motivation for most people belonging to a religion.

Most people stay in religion, not because of strong beliefs, but because they fear losing their sense of community and belonging, and they also fer how others will view them if they leave.

snytiger6 Level 8 Oct 21, 2017
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You are probably right, which blows my mind. I have always had trouble understanding and relating to "normal" people. The concept of a need to belong and be part of a group is completely foreign to me. I have friends. I am not totally anti- social but the idea of wanting to fit in, inviting people over for dinner or any other reason, creating situations/ events for the sole purpose of socializing is utterly foreign to me. I would get so tired of explaining my jokes. All the humor is gone when the tutorial begins.

Yeah. For some people socializing is more of a chore than a pleasure. I have reclusive tendencies myself. Still, having studied Sociology in college and through observation, I think most peopel need to feel a sense of belonging.

From an evolutionary standpoint, there is some advantages for sporadic mavericks who don't go along with the crowd and are curious instead of just accepting. They can be innovators, or if the village gets wiped out while they are away, then they are a survivor. Not fitting the norm is not a bad thing, it is just different and helps make humans more diverse to better survive.

As a politician I have been inside hundreds of congregations and many are like the tv show CHEERS drinking grape juice and crackers instead of beer I WANT TO GO WHERE EVERYBODY KNOWS YOUR NAME. ....but I was repulsed by it all by age ten quitting Boy Scouts and my sister's church even @ age 5 I thought Santa Claus lies were equal to Easter Bunny lies and vaginal virgin birthing alleged baby gods in dirty donkey stable lies....I memorized hundreds of bible verses like poems or the Gettysburg Address not believing just reciting to stand above the fool preacher. ...2 years in a row I was sent to bible summer camp and there I dared ask Atheist questions like : " Who invented gawd ? " dumb shit counselor said: gott has always been " Einstein my hero knew better

5

I want the sense of community that comes with church membership.

JaimeZ Level 2 Sep 25, 2017
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4

No, I don't miss it. Becoming an atheist has freed up alot of time and money for me. I know I have said this in many comments. I truly wish I became an atheist earlier life. Like at 19, 25, or 30.

freedom41 Level 7 Mar 27, 2018
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4

Nope. All that sit down, stand up, kneel, sit, kneel, stand up and sad music and seriousness had to go.

sandyw1952 Level 6 Feb 21, 2018
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Sad music. I love it. Lol.

4

not at all. i have found my post belief life to be so much more fulfilling and enjoyable. I can now be open to learning about science without some type of mental restrictions. Evolution, astronomy - all things i can enjoy learning about without the lens of mythology.

wesmanlv Level 2 Sep 28, 2017
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4

The only thing I miss is the sense of community.
I enjoyed camping trips with the youth group when I was growing up, some of my best memories.

CalebHubbell Level 2 Sep 27, 2017
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4

The only thing I missed was community.

VictoriaNotes Level 8 Sep 26, 2017
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4

Yes, actually, it was so much easier when I thought there was someone there to help me, I live alone been seperated and then divorced for 4 years, it gets hard sometimes

bobbymagee41 Level 3 Sep 16, 2017
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I can relate. I tell myself, it offers a new and different opportunity for growth and socialization; just beyond my comfort zone. Definitely hard, but possible smile001.gif

3

Religion sets up unrealistic expectations about gawd answering prayer and humans being decent people. There are great reasons religious people have more depression. I pity them for believing in fairy tales, but also for the mental health issues that are strongly tied to religion.

educatedredneck Level 7 July 23, 2018
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3

Many people miss the community and support in churches. Unitarian Universalists are mostly atheist or agnostic.

Granted I've been part of this UU community for over two years and consistently help others in need, bringing food, giving rides if I can....

After my big bicycle wreck 6 weeks ago, a fellow UU picked me up from the ER, they delivered food for two days. A UU brought me to surgery, unfortunately the doctor's office didn't tell me they wanted 72 hours of babysitting and the surgery lasted 2 hours longer so my non-UU ride couldn't pick me up. While I was still under anesthesia my UU organized a new ride AND ensured I had three days of coverage complete with meals. Obviously we don't do that with every knucklehead but we try to legitimately help as many as we can.

Some UUs sing hymns and have some church trappings, but I'd be very surprised if any UU preached any specific "faith" other than basic decency towards people, the planet....although some are politically hard left which can be annoying.

[uua.org]

educatedredneck Level 7 July 23, 2018
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3

I miss the socialization and support from church, thank Baal I found Unitarian Universalists, it's a great "church" for atheists.

educatedredneck Level 7 July 23, 2018
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Absolutely! There is nothing to believe as a UU. i am there for like minded people even tho we all do not think alike, all are open to others' way of looking at things. If there was any hint of a dogma I'd be outta there fast.

3

And all the repression that comes with it? All the fear that everything you do is a sin? That god is always watching you? Hell no.

EricJones Level 7 July 17, 2018
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3

I miss the socialization. The fight for social justice and equality. My former church was extremely progressive; but they were selling the same fairy tales. I sometimes wish there was a, "church" for athiests.

Ladyliberty Level 2 July 9, 2018
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Not exclusively for atheists but I think nationally over 70% of UUs identify as atheist or agnostic. We focus on social justice a ton too.

[uua.org]

3

My only regret about leavening religion is not leavening much sooner!

Timothy Level 4 June 25, 2018
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That makes two of us.

3

Not for a second. Being alone is better than being abused.

KarlHannah Level 5 Apr 22, 2018
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3

I miss the networing you can do in church. I've been offered jobs just because I go to the same church as the guy that's doing the hiring. Church is heaven for the machiavellian.

Superstitionfree Level 4 Mar 26, 2018
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3

Hell no.

Donto101 Level 7 Mar 8, 2018
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3

HELL NO!

DarwinistOne Level 7 Mar 6, 2018
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